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There is less slut-shaming than before. At first, she received just groceries. For many young Kenyans, the values espoused in families, schools, and churches simply do not align with the economic realities of the country, or cannot compete with the material temptations that, in the age of reality TV and social media, are everywhere visible. Jackie Phamotse, a South African businesswoman who survived an abusive relationship with a "blesser", described her experiences in a tell-all book, Bare: The Blesser's Game. Then it was trips to the salon. Phamotse eventually fled her abuser, with nothing to show for the relationship. Grace, a year-old single mum from northern Nairobi, has a regular sponsor, but is actively seeking a more lucrative relationship with a man who will invest in her career as a singer. If one end of the sugar spectrum features young women with their sights set on a hot pink Range Rover, a luxury condo and first-class tickets to Dubai, at the other are women angling for little more than some mobile phone credit and maybe a lunch at Java coffee house. But somehow, we have arrived at a point where having a "sponsor" or a "blesser" - the terms that millennials usually apply to their benefactors - has for many young people become an accepted, and even a glamorous lifestyle choice.

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